tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post3230624859144080347..comments2024-01-11T05:51:43.225-08:00Comments on Yoon's Blur: Why adoption hurts (Part 3): a ListMilahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14088039434355591753noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-50658123351678082572010-04-06T06:16:02.849-07:002010-04-06T06:16:02.849-07:00Denise, thank you for sharing so openly and honest...Denise, thank you for sharing so openly and honestly. I know it can be hard being an adoptive parent at times, especially in the adult adoptee world. But I appreciate your willingness to push through and open yourself up to learning more. Your daughter will benefit greatly.<br /><br />As an adoptee myself, all I hope for is that people will open themselves up to be willing to acknowledge that adoption is not a perfect solution, that it involves deep wounds and loss that cannot be magically swept away.<br /><br />We never talked much about how adoption affected me in my family, and it really did have detrimental effects on me as I entered adolescence and adulthood. We're talking more about it now, but it certainly would have helped me and meant so much to me if we could have begun the conversation when I was a child...<br /><br />I'm definitely here to support you. I promise I won't ever bash you (although I will of course always be sincere and honest). :) I strive to treat others with the same patience, respect, gentleness and understanding that I long for others to show me.<br /><br />Thanks, again, for stopping by, and and thank you again for being willing to expose yourself to adult adoptee blogs. It's a world full of various perspectives and experiences, and although they may not always agree, they all are in need of recognition and consideration. Feel free to email me any time.Milahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14088039434355591753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-41629000988503001192010-04-06T05:52:37.313-07:002010-04-06T05:52:37.313-07:00Melissa, I am an adoptive Mom of a 4 year old from...Melissa, I am an adoptive Mom of a 4 year old from China and I appreciate you writing about topics that are difficult for me to read. I think that I was clueless when we first adopted our daughter as to what she was going to feel like growing up in a white world (we live in the south). I also admit that I have tried not to go to adult adoptee websites for fear of getting "slammed" for doing what I felt was God's calling for us. I guess what I know I need to do now is educate myself on how to best prepare our daughter to face her past...and to not ever diminish her feelings of loss. Thank you for your honesty and I promise to be back...I may really need your advice in a few years...Denisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05698075004097344070noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-59459659870704372062010-04-05T21:07:57.684-07:002010-04-05T21:07:57.684-07:00Diane, thank you for sharing your own experiences ...Diane, thank you for sharing your own experiences to understand and relate...<br /><br />I am so sorry for your loss. I absolutely dread the day that my Dad will no longer be here with me. Truly, my heart goes out to you.Milahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14088039434355591753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-33681244788207179742010-04-05T19:35:55.262-07:002010-04-05T19:35:55.262-07:00Melissa- When my father passed away at the end of ...Melissa- When my father passed away at the end of last year I was surrounded by support. I don't know how I would have walked through a minute of grief without that support.<br /><br />To think of a mother who loses her child through adoption not receiving support- or a child who loses their mother not receiving that support is horrible. <br /><br />To think of the loss itself never being acknowledged at all- excruciating.<br /><br />Your last line resonates deeply.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00862203355411742734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-30072679997368315132010-04-05T06:22:14.074-07:002010-04-05T06:22:14.074-07:00David, thank you so much for taking the time to re...David, thank you so much for taking the time to read this post and for being willing to consider the difficult complexities of the adoptee experience.<br /><br />If you haven't already, the blog, The Missing Piece: Thoughts of a Black Adoptee (http://missinpiece.wordpress.com/)--which it so happens that the blogger left a comment on this particular post--is an excellent one to read...Milahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14088039434355591753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-20757268934890641202010-04-05T05:58:13.305-07:002010-04-05T05:58:13.305-07:00Thank you for your honest thoughts on this topic. ...Thank you for your honest thoughts on this topic. As a parent of adopted children it is a great reminder to listen to those that have been in those shoes and to not forget how hard it is going to be.Davidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13698911843214648505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-7470393980694212402010-04-03T20:09:53.010-07:002010-04-03T20:09:53.010-07:00missinpiece, thanks for stopping by and for taking...missinpiece, thanks for stopping by and for taking a moment to comment.Milahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14088039434355591753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1068702647356713810.post-10811962669143500582010-04-02T17:18:02.690-07:002010-04-02T17:18:02.690-07:00this is all so very true.this is all so very true.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com