Monday, April 5, 2010

(feeling lost) Again


I am feeling lost. Again.

I exploded (or imploded) again.

I ended up on the floor again. Like a pile of rags.

I wanted to punch the wall again.

I wanted to scream and screech and hiss.

Again.

I wanted to walk away. Again.

I wanted to disappear. I wanted to be invisible. Again.

Like I was before.

Before I got a glimpse of what it is like to be seen.

by someone who wants to see.

by someone who will hold you to a mirror.
and smile

because he sees what you do not.
cannot.

and he says that it is--

Good.

3 comments:

Solim said...

Well said!

I love your repetition of "again". That is exactly how I feel on a daily basis. It is something I've been trying to come to terms with--and am slowly able to accommodate in my life because, well, it refuses to go away.

Melissa said...

Thanks, Solim, for your comment. I admire your energy and effort to come to terms with such a daily barrage of emotion. Some days are better for me, some days are worse...it comes and goes. But as you said "it refuses to go away." Whether covertly or overtly, it seems always to remain.

Mia_h_n said...

You know where to find me if you ever want to talk.